The King of the Hill Quotes Page: "The Redneck on Rainey Street"
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Quotes from "The Redneck on Rainey Street"
Written by Jim Dauterive
Directed by Gary McCarver
RUTH: Look, Connie's a really smart Asian girl, but I've got a boatload of them -- pardon the expression. She's not black, she's not hispanic, or even white. I mean, good Lord, give me a white kid from a public school with Connie's specs, and that kid could waltz in here.
KAHN: You telling me Connie didn't get in because she's an overachieving Asian? That's discrimination!
RUTH: In a way, it's flattering, isn't it? Look, maybe there's something you left off Connie's application, some kind of hook. Has she ever had to play that violin of hers on the street to buy her strung-out mother just one more hit?
KAHN: No.
RUTH: Well, that would have helped.
KAHN: Ted! I look for you at the Buddhist temple.
TED: Oh, hi, Kahn. We're Episcopal now. It's just good business.
MINH: We the kind of losers politicians pander to in speeches.
BILL: It's so exciting living in an up-and-coming neighborhood. I wonder where they'll put the Starbucks?
DALE: So now that our street has been declared hot, what street should we look down on? Baggley? No, Apple Blossom. Apple Blossom is crap!
HANK: Yep.
KAHN: Yes, sir... I filed my TPS reports yesterday.
ELVIN: Dang, man, I been in jails that gave me more freedom than you got.
KAHN: Yeah, but what are you gonna do?
ELVIN: Whatever I damn want, whenever I damn want, with whoever I damn want.
KAHN: Boy, you say "damn" a lot.
ELVIN: Hell, yeah.
ELVIN: Take a good look at yourself, friend. Are you rockin' in the free world? Are you?
MINH: You want to be a redneck? That's not even possible!
KAHN: Minh, don't you see? There's a paradise out there! A place where nobody works, nobody cares, nobody have plans or dreams that can be crushed.
MINH: I don't know, Kahn. Sounds crazy.
KAHN: Come on, Minh, let's just give up!
MINH: Hm. I'd never have to read another Toni Morrison book for Book Club, or write another check to NPR! Oh, but what about Connie?
KAHN: Don't you see? This is for Connie. So she don't spend half her life losing at their rigged game. What do you say, Minh? Will you be my redneck bride?
MINH: Yes, Kahn, I will. Now take me in the back of that El Camino!
LUANNE: He's got the coolest car-truck, and he's got a laundry machine in his backyard for stray dogs to have puppies in.
CONNIE: And then they made me quit practicing my concerto to play "The Devil Went Down to Georgia."
BOBBY: Sounds to me like you're living the life. Fried food, no studying, the TV's always on... (sighs)
DOOLEY (to Connie): Your dad is white trash.
PEGGY: This has got to stop, Hank. Abby Holliday says that Kahn is turning Rainey Street into another Belcher's Grove!
HANK: I didn't get novelty mailboxes out of this neighborhood just to see this happen.
KAHN: Why they call you Lucky?
LUCKY: True story: I was at Costco one day when the nature called. Yelled is more like it. So I hightail it into the john, and there's some sensitive guy there changin' his little boy's diaper on one of them baby ironing boards. And don't you know, I slipped on pee-pee and broke two vertebrae which had to be fused together. I'm in constant pain, but I got me a $53,000 settlement.
ELVIN: This sumbitch is never gonna have to work another day in his life.
LUCKY: That's why they call me Lucky.
DALE: Hit him, four-eyes!
SOFT-SPOKEN GORILLA MAN (to Hank): They're talkin' about you.
HANK: Stop feeling sorry for yourself and start thinking about Connie. You want her growing up in the back of an El Camino?
KAHN: What choice do I have? We flee horrible dictatorship, learn a new language, work hard and study hard. And our reward for doing everything right is to be told "Go to hell. You work too hard. You study too hard."
KAHN: Connie like a beautiful lotus growing out of the muck. That's her hook!
CONNIE: I'm sorry my application was tardy. It's been a hectic time. My parents don't work, we nearly lost our home, my dad abandoned us for a while and he nearly got killed with a two-by-four. That's him.
ADMISSIONS DIRECTOR: You've overcome so much. Welcome aboard.